Lucky me

My mind is fuzzy from sleep and too many things are going on in my head. But the difference between tonight and anything I’ve written so far is that tonight, I’m blissfully content and happy.

Today’s just been one of those special days. It was a weekend to start with, and everything that was supposed to happen today, happened, and more.

I’m happy, and a little sad because I know this happiness is shortlived. I wish I could say more right now, for today is the epitome the reason why my blog is named Awfully Lucky. For I am lucky to know people and experience things that are amazing. But it’s ironic and awful because I get to experience these things, only to never see the end, never have them for good as long as I want, never to be fully content. It is not because I’m ungrateful. I am very grateful for the stuff that happens to me. What bugs me is that it’s never complete. It’s like you work very hard to get a good grade, and you get it, only to realize that the grade doesn’t even count.

I still have hope. I hope one day I’ll stop being Awfully Lucky and just be lucky.

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Leadership…or lack thereof

Every morning within half an hour of getting out of the house on my way to work I can think of five different things to write about.

So why is it that now I’m sitting with my blog at 11:15 pm and the cursor refuses to move and produce tastefully nonchalant but hopefully-interesting …well…stuff?

Truthfully my days are not totally uneventful. It’s just that usually I’m too indifferent towards them (can I say that? Too Indifferent?) or I don’t like going back to them again. Sort of trying to avoid reliving it you can say.

But I will mention one thing today though.

Professionals at work take their jobs seriously. It is expected of them. However, I dislike the attitude that some have that their work is the most important thing around and that without their contribution the whole system would collapse. What’s worse, their quest for perfection makes other people uncomfortable and makes things difficult for the poor souls who, let’s just say, don’t make their woes known that much. A team should be exactly that, a team. Everybody is fighting their own battles and going through their own issues within a team. It falls to all the members to pick each other and raise the morale in positive ways instead of hitting the bottom and complaining all the time.

I also feel uncomfortable with people who are not assertive when they need to be and don’t stand up for their own roles as leaders. I am the youngest and the newest in my team and I see people 10-15 years my seniors not being the leaders that they are supposed to be. It makes me wonder why they are so afraid to show others who’s boss.

It’s because people take things way too personally around here. In our country, it would be difficult to find a corporate culture where people can differential between what’s personal and professional issues. In this country, where we call our seniors Brother by default and age and experience is more of a factor to promotions than ability, taking things personally is a pandemic.

I’m getting  ahead of myself here actually. I just wanted to vent but my mind’s going off to directions that would need intense research that frankly I’m too tired to do right now.

So I’ll finish here, another of my lame endings that I’m actually painfully used to by now.

Speaking of endings, next post may be about exactly that. Endings!

Maybe this is the end to my bad endings. I can always end, with the beginning of the next post 😀

?

Firstly a little background. I found the Ask A Question option in facebook today. Dunno if it’s been there before. Anyway, you can see the question I put up.

So I put the ‘?’ mark in the search field in iTunes to see what songs would come up.

Some of the results are.. in no particular order…

My Girl, where did you sleep last night? – Nirvana

Who Are You? – Black Sabbath

D’you know what I mean? – Oasis

Why does it always rain on me? – Travis

How is your life today? – Porcupine Tree

Where is Everybody- Nine Inch Nails

And the Entire GnR The Sphagetti Incident? album.

Now I’m wondering which songs come up when people search for ? in their playlists.

Red

Red

It was raining a lot today. We had a post-eid hangout planned and it totally bummed me out to see that it was raining. Hard.

I don’t hate rain. Infact, I’ve written lots of little rain inspired pieces back when I was in school, sitting on my balcony watching the multicolored buildings of the city washed into a dull, beautiful gray. I just don’t happen to like sinking my new pretty shoes into the mud and get my hair all poofy, is all.

It was a good time though in the end, with good food, good company and the desire to have more days like this. Brings to light that reality will set in again from Sunday, where I will have to watch the rain from inside the glass walls of an office building. Wait what am I saying? I probably won’t even notice it raining, let alone give it a chance to ruin my pretty shoes.

Googling Dhaka

If you Google Image-search Dhaka every 80% of the pictures on the first and subsequent pages are about the streets of Dhaka full of thousands of vehicles and thousands of people. Sure you’ll get a glimpse of a closeup of a Rickshaw or a random snapshot of a bride and groom at a Dhaka wedding (that was the 12th picture that came up!!!) but mostly its traffic..traffic… TRAFFIC.

Anyone who lives in Dhaka develops two perspectives on traffic.

  1. They complain about it ALL THE TIME. Even when they’re sitting at home sipping their milky tea and wondering about the state of the world or their slowly diminishing hairlines. They bicker about it when they’re stuck in the middle of traffic to their chauffers, their rickshawpullers, their CNG drivers (CNGs are three wheelers that use Compressed Natural Gas as fuel, and are hence called CNGs. What else will you call them?), their annoyed kids sitting with them with the traffic, and to no one listening in particular.
  2. They ignore it like an embarrassing moment of a young age. Like say if you ever walked into your parents grabbing each other in the kitchen. Would you ever acknowledge that? I wouldn’t. People in this category develop a sort of patience that, well, only Dhaka-ites who are patient with traffic can develop. There is no appropriate simile for this.

Most people belong to category 1. A few handful alternate between 1 and 2. No one is on 2 alone. If I had the time, or the artistic abilities that I so desire right now, I’d draw a funny little venn diagram cartoon to make this more interesting. I don’t so let’s just move on.

But why is an entire being of a city- a city that has so much going on it- be represented to the rest of the world by just its traffic scenario? Granted it’s a big deal but there are other cities that have major traffic issues as well like Tokyo and Sao Paulo. Do you know what you get when you google Tokyo and Sao Paulo? Exactly what the cities look like. Hundreds of sky scrapers and brilliant lights and people and everything you see in the city. Not just traffic.

Maybe one day it’ll change. Not any time soon, but maybe one day. Till then I’m just going to keep my headphones on as my mother panics over being stuck on the road for an hour. I can be category 1 tomorrow.